Single Mama Dating Drama

So it's been over a year and I've been quiet, reflective, and doing regular self checks and now I'm ready to get back out into the dating scene, I think... I've never been a "dater", if we talk on a regular and go out a few times we're together lol just the way it's lined up for me. I do think that was my main issue, I would settle down with whoever was  around and shut down whoever came next, not really getting the feel I should've been getting in my 20s, feel me? Lol seriously, right now I'm at a stage where I don't want anything serious or draining I just want to have FUN! Go to a movie, dinner, concerts,laugh, hang out-you know the easy stuff.

So far, I've met a few really nice guys, some popping up from the past and some new friends but oddly enough, when I'm at a point where I just want to chill THEY want to settle down!!! 0_O Just my luck! Let's talk about 3 that stand out in my dilemma:

The first, we'll call him Too Cool. I met Too Cool maybe a week after the Wasband left, on the Q and I noticed his shoulders first (my weakness) and some how before we crossed the Manhattan Bridge he ended up getting a seat right next to me. We end up smiling at each other, a silly conversation starts up, in the end we end up getting off at the same stop. FATE right?? We exchanged numbers and he's been the only guy I've talked to ever since. He was talking moving in together just a few months in, he wanted to meet Chunks and everything. PAUSE buddy!!! Here I faced Single Mama Dating Drama (SMDD) #1 : Protecting My Guy. Any one who knows me knows how psycho protective I can become when it comes to Chunks so having some new guy meet my little guy was a biggie. Maybe 7 months into talking, we got our kids together for a play-date and it was smooth and it's been smooth. He's really great, a GREAT father, loving son, hard worker, ambitious, and so so loving! I can't sing his praises enough, and mention of the M word (marriage) has started to come up, but for some reason, my heart's not connecting and I can't put my finger on just why that is...

Then there's PopUp, PopUp is an ex that as his name suggests pops up from time to time. I KNOW PopUp isn't the ONE, I've known that since forever but there's something about him that won't let me totally shut the door and lock it. He wants what I ultimately wants and he says he knows he would want that life with me, he just never got to the part of life that slows down. No matter what relationship either of us were in through the years, if we happened to pop up in each other's lives, well...And now he's back. Since I'm in my Cyndi Lauper mode right now he should be perfect right? WRONG while we can laugh ALL night, we always get too serious with each other, even  though we're not serious. I shouldn't have to "argue" with the fun guy smh!! Even though he's a father, he can't get that my time is shared AFTER my time with Chunks. YES! YOU COME 2nd!! and NO I'm NOT looking for his father's replacement!

Oh did I mention BOTH Too Cool and PopUp are Scorpios? Supposed to be my perfect match ::sigh::

Lastly, there's Mr.Carter, everything about him is so Brooklyn! His swag, his smart mouth, his work ethic, his ball game! Ugh I love it! He's fairly new and the oldest of the bunch but slowly creeping his way in. He's, so far the only one that gets that I'm a mom and can't hang out all the time and I love how great a dad he is to his. We've had a few lunch dates here and there and it's been fun, I think what makes this easier is I know this ain't IT so it's all light weight, until it's not...I've "known" (meaning I've seen him around, said hi and bye a few times) for a year or so but he finally got the courage to ask for my number maybe a month ago and already asking to meet Chunks. NO! Why would you need that? I don't even know if I'm keeping you around for me so WHY would I bring the best part of me around you? ::sigh::

All these guys are great guys and have things that I swoon for about them, I just wished they were, you know, like "regular" guys who just want to chill and have fun. LOL I know I know, women complain about men not wanting to settle down and here I am complaining. I'm sorry, I'm not there yet. Stayed tuned for more of the SMDD saga ::cue soap opera music::